The Hesperian hot takes

Credit: hottake.life

The Hesperian Hot Takes gives students a chance to share an unpopular opinion in exactly five sentences. Click here to find out how to submit a hot take for future issues.

Hot Take: Bud light and its parent company deserve to be boycotted and serve as a warning to others.

Bud light – the staple of the working-class, midwestern American has now become an “ally” of deranged leftists who believe that men can be women and women can be men. While this has become a political issue, it’s also worth noting that Anheuser-Busch quite possibly made the worst mistake in its history by giving control of the brand’s image to the out of touch Harvard-educated, Vice President of Marketing Alissa Heinerscheid – who sought to remove the “fratty and out of touch culture” of the brand by replacing it with a supposed “woman” as its figurative spokesman. Of course, there are brands like Patagonia and Nike that are more catered towards left-leaning individuals and are successful at it. But choosing to effectively destroy the image of one of working-class America’s staple products with ridiculous pandering for transgender nonsense is more than an acceptable case for a collective boycott – which so far has proven successful as Bud Light sales drop and Anheuser-Busch executives try to pretend they care about their customer’s values once again. This case should be a stern warning for any company seeking to betray the values or interests of its customers in this politicized society we face today, as many will not tolerate the ridiculous pandering of companies anymore.

-Jordan Rosenberg, history, class of 2024

Hot Take: Student loans should be banned.

Banning student loans will ultimately force college to be more competitive and will lower the price of admission. Additionally, it will cut down all the funds that universities spend on pointless programs and initiatives, such as diversity, equity, and inclusion training. In the future, banning loans will make it so that while-collar jobs do not require a college degree. Afterall, college isn’t for everyone. Banning loans will ultimately help students in the long-run.

-Anonymous Student

Hot Take: Democrats will likely lose the next generation.

Democrats are by far the largest users of abortion, often sterilize the youth with “hormone therapy,” allow sex reassignment surgeries for their children, and tend to live in cities where kids are more expensive. Not to mention, the Millenial generation and Generation Z are avoiding having children to fight climate change and “overpopulation.” On the other hand, Republicans, on average, have 0.25 more children than Democrats, and the gap continues to grow. Combine this with the large and continuing movement of Conservative parents homeschooling their kids so they don’t spend eight hours a day, five days a week with left-wing activists. The liberal agenda is a recipe for disaster and will likely lose the next generation.

-Anonymous Student

Hot Take: Rap is the worst popular music genre.

It’s just fast-talking, at least for the rappers who are popular. While the lyrics may be clever occasionally, it’s hard to understand them half the time, anyway. All the super popular rappers just talk quickly over a beat that seems close to a replica of all other rap songs. It doesn’t feel like there’s a whole lot of quality artistry. But maybe I just haven’t heard the right stuff.

-Sarah Sandoval, integrated educational studies, class of 2024

Hot take: Burger King > Wendy’s > In-N-Out > McDonald’s > Shake Shack > Five Guys

While we should all agree that Smashburger is undoubtedly the greatest fast food burger chain, Burger King is the next best thing for its incredible value with respect to its burgers as well as the quality of its flame-grilled whopper, perfectly salted french fries, delicious spicy chicken fries, and Zesty Sauce (the best fast food dipping sauce in existence). While In-N-Out is good for maintaining its relatively low prices, both Burger King and Wendy’s have far better burgers than In-N-Out, and Burger King gives you the most bang for your buck in this respect, putting it slightly above Wendy’s. In-N-Out fries are bland and boring unless you get animal style, and In-N-Out also fails with respect to variety, as it does not even offer chicken nuggets or chicken sandwiches. While McDonald’s has good fries and chicken, its burgers are one of the worst of all fast food burger chains, both in terms of quality and in terms of value, placing it below the former three chains. Finally, and likely my hottest take of all, Shake Shack and Five Guys are extremely overrated because both chains are incredibly overpriced for mediocre food, Shake Shack has the worst value with respect to its burgers and the most boring and bland fries of all fast food burger chains, and Five Guys is far too greasy to enjoy in the first place.

-Ethan Oppenheim, political science and philosophy, class of 2024

One thought on “The Hesperian hot takes

Leave a Reply